last night as i left the beehive i decided to get a cup of tea to go. standing at the counter a man came up to me, reeking of alcohol and a bit hunched over probably due to lack of balance. he had a dollar and some change in his hand and asked if i might be able to help him out, that he was just so hungry and just wanted some soup. the girl behind the counter started to yell at him. "CAN YOU NOT HARASS MY CUSTOMERS?!?!? THANK YOU!!!" he said in a quiet voice that he wasn't harassing anyone and i asked him what he wanted. he pointed to the soup in the deli case and i handed the girl a $10 dollar bill and told her to add that to my total. she looked and me like my head was spinning around and said "Are you sure? ...you know you don't have to do that." i said i was sure. she turned around and turned back. "...you're sure..." again i said i was sure. she started punching things into the cash register slowly, as if maybe i might change my mind if she hesitated enough. "you're sure..." "yes" i assured her. "i'm sure." i walked out the door before the man got his soup but the girl just stood there as i walked away as if she was at a loss for what to do.
i don't mean to tell this story out of pride by any means. i've come across this situation a hundred times. this one is no different. but it made me think about the impact left on this girl last night. maybe she dismissed it as soon as her shift was over. but maybe not. i walked into the beehive last night with less money than this man had in his hands when he came up to me. but i just happened to run into a friend i hadn't seen in a month that owed me $10 and just happened to have it on her. mainly this is all to say that i stand in awe of the way God moves through people towards His good and perfect purpose and it made me think as i drove home about what "broken vessels" really means. if i had come from a sheltered and relatively stable family, would i have done the same thing last night? maybe. probably. it wasn't a decision i had to think about. the money was there and he had need. but on my way home i thought of my parents, and how many midnights they've spent drunk and how close they came to being where that man was last night and i started to cry. at the humility that required and i started to think about this man's family, and why he was out at midnight, with a dollar and wanting some soup and how much i would want someone to do exactly the same thing if my parents found themselves in that situation.
and i prayed. for this man i only talked to for a matter of a minute and did nothing of great consequence for, and crying.
the longer i live in a relationship wih Him, the more i understand being a servant as an honor and a calling and a dying to self...and the more i hunger for more of it, more of Him in me.
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2 comments:
thanks, but it's not me, it's Him.
I'm not really a Marxist, but stories like this make me realize the true extent of the alienation present in our society. The girl thought you were crazy for reaching out in love to a fellow man. It should be natural, but it's not. I'm always shocked and disgusted at the way we as a society are able to ignore need. It is perhaps the most alientating thing I can imagine. I'm proud of you for bridging the gap and being Christ in the world.
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